I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
