what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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