what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
