We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
