The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
