: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
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