I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize