69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The beer is more important than you right now.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
