Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
