Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
