chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Just pee around me
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
