party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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