What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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