I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
