So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
