There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Randomize
