Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
