it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
she told me i tasted like america
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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