I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
