Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The uberlube is also flammable
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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