Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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