i don't like sucking hair
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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