like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
