haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
