A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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