whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
