He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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