Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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