Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
