Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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