i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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