It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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