i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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