Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
