the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
