there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
