How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
