ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
You ruined the universe
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
