found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
