i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
