she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
