You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
