i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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