Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize