so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
