I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Randomize