hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
this boner is exhausting
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
