Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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