i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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