she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Dear god my vagina.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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